Sunday, December 9, 2012

going natural in 2013

i've been thinking about starting 2013 off with only using products that i could eat......if it goes on my skin it should be safe right?  it just doesn't make sense to use anything but natural.  on that note, i have a lot of research to do before the end of this month.   i've also thought about at least changing one or two products every month instead of going full blown changing it all. i want this to stick...i want it to be a good transition.   that means changes with make-up, shampoo, conditioner, lotion, chapstick, and the list goes on....

becoming more conscious of my mark on this world leads to becoming more responsible of my every day choices.  my life matters.  my choices matter.   so do yours. 

Sunday, October 21, 2012

wash me clean...


we have to be open to letting anything and everything change us....or affect us is perhaps the phrase to use instead.....none of this 'on the surface' shit.  i don't want to skim on the water like a rock being skipped on smooth still ponds....i yearn to be washed over and cleansed by massive waves and torrential rains of a hurricane.  

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

it's hard to dance with the devil on your back...


i sometimes forget to have fun.  i get so deeply involved in trying to be a better person that i forget to just let go and let life flow.  in the midst of telling myself every day to be more loving, less critical, more at ease, less judgmental of others, i realize i am completely immersed in being mean, critical, unkind, and judgmental of myself....which in turn expands any kind of feelings of being inadequate.  enough is enough right?  i understand now that i get so caught up in that future potential that i don't allow myself to just be the me i am right now.  no more dragging that horse around.....i'm gonna shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, shake it out....

Wednesday, October 10, 2012

history of meat eating if you please



It's been half a year with no meat consumption.    Yes, I've lost weight...but only after figuring out the healthiest way to be vegetarian (and I'm still learning).  Yes, I have more energy.  Yes, it does make it hard to eat out.  I have found it is very hard to be vegetarian in the South; everything revolves around meat.  Even if something doesn't have meat in it, it is usually flavored with meat or meat is cooked in it....it starts with meat somehow.  

As the season change, I am struggling (my body is) to adjust to vegetarianism once again.  The comfort foods I am so used to making in the Fall are not in alignment with who I am anymore....chicken and dumplings, chili, grilling meat outside, bbq in the crockpot all day..and so on.  It's as if my body remembers how I eat when Summer turns to Fall....is this possible?   In my curiosity to find this out I have stumbled on so much research about how our bodies have evolved to eat meat....even our jaws/teeth have been drastically changed.  

It has led me to be more inquisitive about the history of meat eating...and how it affects humans/animals/the world....how we all have evolved from it...benefits and/or harmful disadvantages.   I'm fascinated by it all now.  If you have any links/articles/books/etc that might aid in my interest, please feel free to inform me.

Sunday, September 23, 2012

free.....


sometimes i think i will rebel and so i don't shave for a few days......then i get paranoid it will limit me (shorts wearing, swimsuit, the looks, the obsession of not shaving as opposed to the obsession WITH shaving) so i shave again.  then the whole process starts over.   i think i might be a happier person if i let those shaving worries go.  i'm in that whole process right now with not dyeing my hair.  aren't there plenty of things to worry about rather than the vain attempts of fighting aging?  it's going to happen anyway, why fight it...it's futile.  ....and then comes the seeing myself in a mirror when a short gray hair is sticking straight up...or god forbid i pull my hair back in a ponytail...HELLO GRAY SIDES!  so far though, i am not trying to conceal the grays...it's been about 7 months or more since i have.   

sure we all want to look young as long as possible....but when that interferes or distracts from the short life we have, it seems trivial...ridiculous even.   decades ago i wished i was a boy....the main reasons why i wished for that?  i didn't want to worry about shaving....i wanted to walk around shirtless when it's hot....i felt like it wasn't fair that guys didn't have to shave underarms or legs...i had no idea what to do with makeup as my mom never wore any so i was clueless.  i was a tomboy and wanted to stay that way.  even back then i saw the absurdities and the differences of how women were judged compared to men. 

so even though i THINK i would be a happier person if i didn't shave, the truth is i wouldn't...at least not at this point.   what i really wish for is to not care either way.  that is the more rebellious way to me....to not let it affect me one way or the other......so my legs are shaved...so what?   or so i haven't shaved in 5 days....so what??   this should have no relevance to how freeing or limiting my days or life is.  somehow it does.   today i felt rebellious...i got in the shower, washed my face, washed my hair and body, and was done.  i got out, put some lotion on, got dressed.....DONE.  no makeup.  no primping. no shaving.  i grabbed the first clothes i saw and was finished getting ready.  

my point in all this chatter about shaving or not shaving is that it symbolizes other things in life too.  long hair, short hair?  gray hair or dyed hair?  make-up or natural?  painted nails or color free?  heels or flats?  dresses or jeans?   doesn't it seem absurd?    who cares?   sadly, a lot of people do...society does...the high standards we put on women do.....the judgements we put on ourselves and others do....the list goes on. 

as my friends' kids grow up, i can't help but think about what they will face.  right now i'm not thinking of me or my generation or generations before but how this whole thing MUST change so they (children now) don't grow up with these warped ideas of beauty or what they should or shouldn't do to fit in.  let them live free of this senseless worry................let them frolic in the fields and pools and nature more..........let them be free.  think of all they could accomplish. 

Thursday, August 16, 2012

rock the boat


here we are mid august already....this summer has flown by, just like life does.  I love summer but i haven't been outside as much as i would have liked.   mosquitoes are bad around here...as is west nile virus so i hear.  last year i was so disappointed that i wouldn't be traveling during the summer,  this time around i'm sorta glad for it....though packing is much easier and lighter in the summer months. 

speaking of being lighter....i am still not eating meat.  it's been months now and i don't miss it.   this week i have been thinking about fish though...perhaps it's because i can't stop thinking about the beach...those two go hand in hand usually.

today i am hammering metal hoops.....oh, and my fingers...only one of those i mean to hammer.

i am taking apart jewelry today.  i am hammering metal.  i am taking brand new supplies and manipulating them into something else.  i am reinventing how i usually make something.  it's time.  it's time to do what i want with what i want.  change is good.  making something *yours* is good. 

i am setting intentions.  i am consciously thinking and envisioning what i want with every item i create today...i envision myself taking a step forward with each thing...and then sometimes two.  life is short, make it happen, i tell myself. 




Friday, August 3, 2012

no meat, no apologies


 

i don't like labels.  black, white, southern, yankee, democrat, republican, liberal, hippie, yuppy, gay, straight..............................BUT, ever since i quit eating meat i sorta like adding vegetarian to identify who i am.  i'm sure as time goes on 'vegan' will sound even better.   my friend Sarah wrote a blog post today that made me ever more aware that i DO like labels when they represent what i believe in. 

we get choices in life every day, but it's not often that we can choose something this BIG.....we get to make a choice that lessens pain for other creatures......every day when i wake up i am happy to be a vegetarian....i don't feel a loss, in fact i feel like i have gained a tremendous amount.  i feel liberated...relieved to be living a lifestyle that is more Me....i dare say, i'm even proud of my choice.  proud because i have stuck with it this time....proud because i always knew this was my path but i didn't have the willpower to stick with it, or the timing wasn't right, who knows.  either way, i'm glad i have folks like Sarah in my life that can write a blog post like she did and validate how i choose to live, and also point out that it just isn't possible to keep quiet about something just because it makes others uncomfortable.

speaking of not keeping quiet,  i have been altering my etsy shop a bit, not only with what i am creating, but how it represents me and how i choose to live life.  life should be fun, and i intend to go about it in that way from now on.


Thursday, August 2, 2012

life, positivity, good things


i like positivity.   i like good people.   i like choices that help people to attain a kind of joy that we all should have.  i like good food....good *healthy* food.

a choice made a few months to not eat meat was a good one *for me*...i don't like being attacked for my decision, yet so many people feel under attack when i say i am a vegetarian.  i've started noticing that when one stands up for what one believes...especially when it isn't mainstream, people get defensive.

i made the choice to be vegetarian, and eventually vegan, for many reasons.....but a huge one is i made the decision not to make choices that hurt others...and that includes animals.  i've always been an animal advocate and lover, but my reasons go way beyond that too.  i'm also a huge environment lover.  ...i'm disappointed in those that have no respect for this gift of life and this land we live on. 

i'm straying from my point....back to i like positivity.  look for the good in every day.  like yesterday for example, here is a list of good things that happened:

~while driving to the post office i noticed a woman walking down the street in a 'carefree, life is good, smiling to herself, arms scissoring at her sides with enthusiasm........i couldn't help but grin and that good feeling carried me the rest of the way to the post office

~standing in line at the post office, there was an older woman taking what seemed like forever trying to decide which sheet of stamps she wanted......at first i thought, "aww, that's sweet"......after minutes i began getting restless and ready for her to leave........she finally decided on one, but they were out....which led the whole cycle to start back over.  now, that wasn't my finest moment in patience, but i kept quiet and didn't show my frustration.  she FINALLY decided on a sheet of stamps but you could tell she was disappointed and walked out not having what she wanted.   my first emotion was "FINALLY...she is gone"......i got waited on with a quickness and walked out.  as i exited the building i see her struggling to get in her car....and as i walked past she smiled a genuine smile and said "things don't work like they used to"..............i immediately felt a rush of love.....and embarrassment at my impatience.   so what if she took awhile to pick out stamps?.......i take longer to pick out shampoo for goodness sake.   i preach about slowing down...enjoying the simple things....well that is exactly what she was trying to do....she wanted the stamps she wanted.  good for her!!  my point is that we all have certain things we want that allows us to have more joy...for her at that moment it was stamps...i'm the same way....i always choose stamps that make me feel good.  let everyone just love what they love...and let's all have more patience with one another.  a good lesson to have yesterday.


~finding good new music.  that my friends is one of my serious joys in life.

~really fresh, soft, smell good, biting into a cloud kind of bread

i have a little project in the works....it's about random antics and daily positivity. 

oh, an update on crochet a scarf a day to give away on my birthday.......this has led to making scarves and donating them to a friend to help fund their adoption of a baby......told ya i was gonna dream bigger....life presented an opportunity and i grasped it greedily.

Sunday, July 29, 2012

birthday life list


here it is.....a truth....
my birthday is in a few days and i intend on making a list of things i haven't done before but that i want to do.......it will be fairly simple things....not a HUGE life list, but it will be a list that makes my life more enriched.....yes there will be things like learn how to play the banjo...but it will be more simple things to start off with like BUY A BANJO...duh...i have "learn how to play banjo" on my life list already, but i've forgotten the main step, which is to have one to play.  first things first right?.....

go to a blues bar.
get a GREAT haircut.
get a massage...a real good LONG, make me cry kind of massage.
find a sunflower field, drive there, and take my picture in it. 

so far that's all i got...but i can do these things within the month....and maybe in within the week!!  like i say folks, life is in the simple things. 

Monday, July 16, 2012

Moods....

Feeling quiet....contemplative....on the search for something....

Monday, July 9, 2012

we are here to be joyful....


no meat update:
i resisted grilled chicken this weekend, and believe you me it smelled divine!! ...but after the initial urge passed i was over it.  one small step for humankind, one giant leap for animals....or something like that.

scarf a day update:
i am behind, but not for long!...thank goodness for huge crochet needles and thick yarn.  also thank goodness for netflix instant play.

what i know to be true:  we MUST try to have as much fun as humanly possible.  we are here to be joyful and to spread joy.  we are here to love life and each other.  it's so simple.

Saturday, July 7, 2012

travel channel and food network had a baby


i have learned that i have immense patience with food and animals....humans?...yeah not so much.   it's not that i *don't* have patience with humans, it's just that i have MUCH more with animals and prepping food.

so, on that note,  i am making Spanakopita....using phyllo dough for the first time ever.  i feel like i'm lightly coating paper with olive oil....and then preparing to cook it.  it feels all sorts of odd.

also,i feel like i should be on a food network show...or travel channel......or maybe travel channel and food network had a baby and TADA, i am it!! i'm making something greek, while listening to cuban, while drinking something mexican, while also drinking something from florida, while using ingredients from italy......it's all too ridiculous :)...ridiculous good. and to top it off...i'm over the top southern.


(to update, i have lost electricity two nights in a row, SO i am one scarf behind on the scarf a day for charity until august 5th - my bday....will catch up this weekend though...and will post scarves i have made as well next week)

Thursday, July 5, 2012

in addition to....i give the gift of giving back for my birthday

in addition to my recent post....

today is exactly one month until my birthday.   starting today, i will be crocheting a scarf (or two) a day to give to charity....my original thought was that i would do 34 scarves by august 5th and then take them to a shelter as a birthday gift to myself....now i'm dreaming bigger than this.  more updates as the next month goes on......i will try to take a picture and post about it every day.  i like the idea of crocheting scarves because not only is it handmade, but it is functional and can keep someone warm in the cold winter.

do you have anyone who might need a scarf?  do you know of a good charity to send to?  do you want to give a scarf away someone you pass by on the street every day?  ......message me or leave a comment and we can make this happen. 

becoming vegetarian...no wait....being vegetarian


i woke up thinking about making a Peach and Blackberry Galette from Pastry Affair.  in my case though, i will be using blueberries since i seemed to have consumed any blackberries i had....within an hour of bringing them home.....as always. 

yesterday i made spicy black bean (and spinach, rice, garlic, cilantro) burgers/patties for me...but i also prepared tilapia for those non vegetarian folks....i about gagged.  now gagging (exaggeration but cringing for sure) is nothing new to me while preparing raw meat...and sometimes even eating cooked meat....but this was something new. i truly wanted no part in preparing this food...even though it's fish that was in freezer, already bought before i quit eating meat...so there was no guilt having bought it for this purpose.   i just truly don't want it anymore.  that's not to say that there won't be another time that meat will be tempting to me....but yesterday was not the time.

so my point being in mentioning the peach and blackberry galette, then mentioning the food i prepared yesterday is that my cravings are changing.....and it fascinates me to see what my body is doing without my consent so to speak.  it even delights me and makes me giggle when i wake up thinking about a galette instead of bacon. (just please don't tempt me with bacon right now....not sure i'm over that temptation)

i am happy these days....i make new recipes, try new foods, constantly pouring over vegetarian websites.....going to the grocery store is now a new adventure....my mindset is different and the old habits are broken with new habits to create.  skipping over the meat aisles make me see the store in a whole new light.    the guilt i have always felt from buying meat is now gone......who knew that it was taking up so much space in who i am?.....ahhh, the power of old habits.

for right now, my intake of cheesy things has gone up....this i hope fades in time.  bread is a staple now which has never been the case for me.  i am not a bread craver....well, i never was.   i find i get hungry way more now.  i also wake up crazy hungry which never used to happen.  i never thought i would be excited to eat my black bean burgers instead of the fish prepared with lemon and butter.  who knew?....and isn't that the exciting part of life?......changing.....becoming someone else all the time....well, that is if we are lucky.....we get closer to OUR truth....the person we hope to be....the person we were meant to be. 

happy day after the 4th folks!  may you set yourself free from whatever holds you back!


Tuesday, July 3, 2012

comparison is the thief of joy


our biggest downfall is comparing who we are to another....comparing our lifestyle to another one....comparing our hair to other hair.....comparing what we drive to what another person drives...comparing our income to another income...comparing our family to another...and the comparisons go on and on.  it's absurd.  we all are so different, yet so many of us think we are supposed to fit into this little ideal package of what life is supposed to look like.  this has NOTHING to do with joy.  this has NOTHING to do with our own free will to see life as something to love not hate.   this has NOTHING to do with choosing to live our day in a kind way.

would i love to have more money? yes.  would i love to drive a great car? yes.  would i love to be able to jet off on some island vacation whenever i want? of course yes.  do i let any of these things hold me back? no.  do i let what my life "lacks" determine my joy? heck no.  do i go about my day seeking out joyful moments? heck yes.  do i choose to make the most of what i have?  double heck yes.   am i determined to keep a positive attitude no matter the circumstances i am in?  duh.

so,  what we own or don't own has no relevance on the joy we choose to experience.   it's a simple as that.

Friday, June 29, 2012

summer girl



june 2012, georgia

it's hot.  it's like 108 degree weather hot...but "feels like" 120.  all i think about these days is laying in a cold river...or maybe a bucket of ice.  i say all this but i secretly (or not so secretly) love it.  i love it because i know winter will come again and all i will think about is craving those summer days.  i love it because flowers bloom in the summer...a popsicle tastes that much better....cold water is that much more refreshing....there are more bees, butterflies, hummingbirds, insects buzzing about.....
i love it because everything is SO green here.....i love it because of heat lightning.  i  love it because of juicy delicious peaches and ripe watermelons.  i love it because i can eat garden tomato sandwiches every day if i want to.  i love it because the frogs and crickets sing me to sleep.  i love it because my heart loves what it loves and i am officially a summer girl....blistering early august Georgia heat welcomed me into this world and i fully embraced it then (probably but how should i remember?) as i do now.  who am i to question what my heart loves?...my job is to enrich my soul with as much as it wants and craves....and i fully intend on doing so this summer!

keep cool everyone and don't forget to hydrate!






Monday, June 18, 2012

enriching life...

making stuffed peppers..mmm, june 2012

i miss traveling.  i miss connecting with my creative peeps.  i even miss connecting with strangers.
i feel a longing today.  it's not a sadness really....just a longing...an ache for more of life....and enrichment of it i suppose.

on another note...but i guess not really, because this is about enriching my life as well, is that i have only had meat (fish is included in this) 4 times in several weeks...maybe (at least) 1 1/2 months....two of those times was no hormone/fresh from the farm so to speak deer and bacon.....once was wild alaskan salmon, and the other day i had a craving for spaghetti so i had ground turkey in it...BIG mistake....i was sick all night long.   needless to say i don't want meat any time soon.   the fact that i haven't been talking about it makes me feel like this time it might stick.....as i have tried many times before to quit eating meat.....this time i have eliminated a lot of dairy too.  i gotta say, my skin has never looked healthier (my face have never been the most clear)...maybe it's not eating meat...or maybe it's just eating more veggies (although i was already doing that)......either way i love it.

at first i was losing weight....but now that i have learned some new recipes, added in a lot more beans and grains to my diet, i am back to normal....but i feel lighter, more energized, in a much better mood most days.  i feel closer to who i really am.  i've never been real comfortable consuming animals.  it actually makes me cringe now to think of it...i have zero cravings for it anymore.  two of the times i caved was while i was visiting friends and smelled the meat cooking.....so i can't say a slip or two won't happen, but since i cook at home most of the time this is preventable.

my ultimate goal is going vegan, but i'm giving myself and my body time to adjust;  plus i have a ton of learning to do when it comes to cooking in a new way....aka not revolving a meal around a slab of meat...yuck.  i know, i know...i'm already turning into one of "those" people....whatever that means.  (that is what was said to me earlier this week)


Sunday, June 17, 2012

the kitchen is meant for dancing too

i like asparagus, june 2012

i like kitchen dance parties.  i like thinking about food.  i, for the most part, like cooking food...the longer it takes to cook/prepare the better, because i like being in the kitchen.  i feel content in the kitchen...like all is right in the world.  every time i get done eating a meal it's like the day after christmas.....depressing in a way.  i usually am immediately, if not already, thinking about what i will make for the next meal.   i like to have a variety of plates to choose from...glasses too.  do i want to serve these peaches in a blue bowl or a yellow one?.......also, don't get in my way...it's not that i don't want you to talk to me, but i like the flow of space...i like to be able to move to the fridge, to the counter, to the stove, to the cabinets and then circle back with ease......and DON'T ask me if i am doing something right or wrong, don't rush me or keep asking if it's ready.....let me enjoy cooking...don't criticize or even seem like maybe that is what you are doing....i will quickly go from being in a good-relaxed-enjoying myself mood to a bitter-irritated-resentful witch in an instant. just being honest here......and a BIG one is DO NOT even think about changing the music i am listening to....if i'm in control of cooking, i'm in control of the music selection.....music is the muse...always.  would you mess up picasso's paint?..or brushes? or god forbid his canvas?......so there you have it..a little sunday truth preaching sermon.  :)  

(i should say i am not ALWAYS prone to turning witchy if one tries to dictate me in the kitchen, but i wouldn't test it)

Saturday, June 16, 2012

soak it all in...


i'm looking for an excuse, any excuse, to take road trips...oh, you are having a hard day?..let me come and console you......you just broke up with someone?....why let me sit on your couch with you and be a listening ear.............what!?, you can't open that can of spaghetti sauce?!....oh my god, i'll come right over and see if i can!!.....

yep, my stuff stays packed.  i find any reason to get rid of something or give it away.  i want less things, but i want more out of life.  i do. i do.  i do.   i feel like i am taking a vow, i do, yes i do life....i do take you as my wild, flowing, who knows what you will do next companion until my last breath.  i want to run through wildflower fields with you, singing at the top of my lungs that i choose you....

i want to drink in joy and spit out fire.....i want to know what that even means.

summer sends me into a restless, i want to do everything kind of mood; not much satisfies but leaps into cold water over and over....dancing to live music on a hot hot summer night......really amazing company with new people or old friends, stirring up even more of that restless spirit.  my soul gets stirred in the summer....it boils....it runs over....it keeps me panting for another drink.  i'm here, i'm ready, and i've got a big glass to fill up. 


Thursday, June 14, 2012

sharing our truth...

i buy tomatoes twice a week, yes i do, june 2012, georgia

so, i've been thinking a bit this week about Andrea's post over at Superhero Designs ....because sharing our truth is scary, liberating, eye opening, brave, emotional, fierce, all of so many emotions tangled up together.....

so anyway, it has me thinking about my truth...some of the truths that are out in the open...some that i push away, not wanting to think about them or face them right now....some i push away knowing they might make my life a bit more complicated for awhile.....one of which is that i am tired of making jewelry...i'm tired of SELLING all the time.....i'm tired of "pushing" material goods when i myself am simplifying my possessions....it isn't in alignment with my 'truth' these days.  i want less but i am producing more more more....every day.  now i don't mind jewelry...in fact i love accessories....i love creating....i love experimenting with making new stuff, BUT i suppose i don't like all the supplies that clutter my space....i want to create something and have it out the door the next day.....i don't like the waiting game of seeing if something sells....waiting for more money to come in.....yes, the creating is in my "control" but the selling is not...not *really*.

the truth is, is that i want my 'supply' list to be simple....a camera...or a pen and paper...or a bit more advanced technology like a laptop that i can take wherever.  i want my supply list to be easy to dash off with in a moment of spontaneity.  i NEED it to be simple.  i want to take photos of farmers' markets, farms, produce, food that makes you salivate and feel alive....a ripe watermelon freshly cut open that makes you want to reach into the photo and claim your mouth's desire......i want to capture simplicity.  i want to take us back to the basics.  a wood table with a lone peach on it......an oak tree standing tall in a pasture....a long winding dirt road leading to nowhere and everywhere.....i want to take us back to the days where life was simple...and our longings were too.......where lying in the grass and looking at the clouds float by was enough.

this is my truth these days.  i don't know where it will take me, but if sharing it will help pave the way, i'm all for it.


Wednesday, June 13, 2012

Langhorne Slim ...music...dancing

June 11, The Earl, Atlanta, Langhorne Slim

June 11, The Earl, Atlanta, Langhorne Slim
I'm gonna gush for a second about how much I love dancing.....then I will gush for a minute about how much I love music....so so much....then let's talk about how much I am over the moon when it comes to live music that makes you dance.....THEN we'll get to the good stuff of Langhorne Slim and how fortunate I am to always get to see them in a small venue with a decent amount of dancing room....seriously folks...I'm in my bliss seeing these guys play.....perform really.....they exude energy....plus so much more that sends me deep into blissful contentment.......no, more than that.....pure joy....the I'm so glad I'm alive and can be a part of this kind of joy.  If you get a chance, go see them.....I would tell you make sure to dance, but it just happens naturally. 

Wednesday, June 6, 2012

dreams...i have dreams...

earrings on display

last night i dreamed of wild dogs.....they were nipping and pinching at me as i made my way into the night through pastures and woods in search for a lost friend.  these dogs were wild, ferocious, and ragged looking...yet strong and scrappy.  i could see a fire burning in the distance, in the woods, but these dogs wouldn't let me through to go investigate.  another girl came up from where i was heading, and she said "be careful out there...i went looking for answers but it's dangerous"...i got the impression she was a journalist of some sort.  she said she was seeking the truth of the situation, the truth that everyone was hiding.    i never got to that fire in the woods, but i did manage to make friends with one of the dogs.  that has to account for something eh?


Monday, June 4, 2012

small changes...

my painted scrap wood signs from 6/3/2012

yesterday i set out to do something a bit out of the ordinary....nothing major, just a small step outside of what i normally do.   so i woke up, got my coffee, and began setting up some tables outside.  i brought all my paint brushes, paints, stencils to a table.  i went and gathered up some scrap wood lying around.   i had no preconceived ideas about what to paint; i just wanted to let myself go with the flow...be in the moment...be inspired by whatever struck me at the time.

i am color obsessed....when i make jewelry it's usually by what color i want to work with.....same goes for paint....or clothes shopping....or food buying.....truly, i love color.   so i picked out what piece of wood i wanted......i picked out the base color, with added streaks of secondary colors, then i went to painting.

to make a long story short, i ended up spending the whole day outside, with time flying by.  music was playing, an abundance of lemon water was consumed, slight breeze with warm weather, and plenty of scrap wood to keep me company.  bliss folks, bliss.  it's all about the small things...the small changes...the small steps outside of what we normally do.

never underestimate small changes in your life....or even the small out of the ordinary moments you decide to experience...those are the things that change your life....don't ignore them.

Saturday, June 2, 2012

chopping broccoli.....

farmer's market, sebastapol, california, february 2012
it's 1:15 PM and i have a towel on my head, coconut lotion lathered on, blasting brandi carlile's Dying Day on my phone, a belly full on fried eggs, toast with pineapple jam, cheese grits, and mango juice. it's a sunny day but the blustering wind makes it impossible to take photos of earrings outside. the other night i watched a passenger-less pontoon boat breeze by, pushed by the wind, having a little night time float on the water....wonder what happened to it.

today i will make my way into the kitchen...i will wash veggies and fruit, cut up celery into the perfect size to dip into peanut butter (or in this case Sunbutter), make MORE kale chips, boil water to make hard-boiled eggs (eggs are beginning to gross me out though), i will cut up broccoli heads into little bit size pieces....oh, speaking of things like broccoli, i made roasted parmesan cauliflower last night...yum yum, and the night before i made zucchini cakes (more like burgers), but in my opinion the recipe calls for too much old bay seasoning...lesson learned.

anyway, the point being is that i am relaxed knowing i will have a day in the kitchen just chopping veggies, prepping food for later use. satisfaction arises from these seemingly trivial tasks. i swear i could chop veggies for a living and be quite happy. bliss.

so, what are you doing on this fine day?

Friday, June 1, 2012

plain and simple...


so, here's the deal......how many things do we say we want to do....*eventually*...*someday*......*when timing is right* ............etc etc etc.??

...and how many things do we *actually* do?...eventually....someday....when the timing is right??

let's talk about time first....in just the short amount of time i have eliminated just *one* thing (facebook) that didn't seemingly take up a lot of time, but obviously did because i have accomplished a ridiculous amount in two short days.....and get this,  even though i am busier, i go to bed feeling more relaxed, at ease, feeling more productive about my hours in the day........i'm using that extra time to do things i've been meaning to do:  my paint and brushes are out,  books that have been waiting are actually getting opened, things are getting organized, goodwill is getting packed up,  new jewelry creations have been made, errands have been run, lots more dancing has occurred, more time spent outside...drinking coffee in the morning by the lake instead of checking internet.  it's amazing.

yes, there is an aspect of "busying myself in order not to feel the urge to be online".....but it's not too hard to immediately feel the benefits of less screen time.  i'm happier. plain and simple.  happier. 

now, take the time to play the above video and dance it out.



Thursday, May 31, 2012

truths...

Pismo Beach, California, March 2012

sometimes when i'm thinking and in reflection i like to call it the "situation room"......isn't that wolf blitzer's show?

getting rid of stuff, especially stuff that you have had packed up, feels quite liberating....it's as if you are entitling yourself to "start over" with the you that you are now, not in the past.

in the past i liked "stuff"....i liked to feel cozy in a room with all sorts of things to look at...cozy nooks, etc.   the *me* now likes minimalism...i like a room to feel like i could dance all through it without worry of bruising myself on furniture or knocking something over. 

....on the same note, in the past i LOVED color throughout a home....bright walls, colorful furniture....but now i love a rustic, simple, white decor with splashes of color.....i like the color to EXCLAIM through the white.....

a BIG truth...one day of no facebook and i find i have SO many words to say......i forgot there was a "writer" inside all the distractions.   i put writer in quotes because, well....because.

also, the more i get rid of...the more i "have"....




Wednesday, May 30, 2012

what, you didn't know i had a microscopic lens?

washbucket...appropriate right?..you know, since i'm cleaning out and all

what's happening right now, this second, is that i am going through every. single. darn. thing. in every square inch of this house deciding if it is *really* needed any longer.   what happens when you have "spare" time on your hands is that you start looking around at your surroundings....things you overlooked before become glaring sunspots of "wwhhhaatttt why do i still have that, i haven't even noticed it in months!!".............just how long does simplifying take?...cause it seems i've been doing it for two years.  sheesh. 

let me say it again....EVERY.SQUARE.INCH. of this place is about to get investigated, questioned, and put under the microscopic lens.  yep. figuratively speaking of course.

feeling lighter...

on amtrak going through utah i think, march, 2012
day one of facebook hiatus and i already feel better.  i woke up relieved that i didn't have to spend the time to check notifications....i feel lighter already.  boomshakalaka.....that's the sound of feeling lighter in case you didn't know.  so, on that note this will probably be the last time i talk about facebook hiatus...i mean really...what's the point of being off facebook if i sit here and talk about it?....




Tuesday, May 29, 2012

facebook hiatus

michelle and david's lovely deck in georgia

i am on a facebook hiatus.  i HOPE for at least a week....if all goes well maybe indefinitely??...who knows.   you add up all the little minutes that one checks notifications...messages...comments...etc.....it all adds up.  i think about the time, those minutes that accumulate, that might be put to better use...getting me closer to where i want to be.  i think about the pressure it takes off to respond to this or that in a timely fashion........what is "timely fashion" anyway?.....someone else's perspective on how long it should take me to write them back?
i will use those minutes i would use on facebook to come up with new ideas...to read...to be outside....instead of taking work breaks to check on facebook...or a lot of times facebook is just "on" all the time while i work....an extra window/tab to click on throughout the day.  blah blah blah.   don't get me wrong, i am ridiculously happy to connect with my peeps....i just don't like all the screen time, time better spent outdoors where i long to be most of the time anyway.  so there you have it.....facebook hiatus.  i feel lighter already.

Monday, May 21, 2012

Things we wish for

i wish for this color in a vw van...but beggars can't be choosers, so i'll take this if given to me :)

Wednesday, May 16, 2012

randomness....

in chicago, april 2012

it's 11:34 a.m. and i want a mint mojito BAD.....but it has to be in a mason jar with fresh mint, otherwise i don't want one.  i blame pinterest ....i wouldn't have nearly as many cravings a day without this site to indulge in.  i don't watch tv, so no commercials to persuade me i need this or that...other than the annoying ones that play during pandora streaming....so Pinterest steps in and makes me want all sorts of things i never knew i wanted.

i have been listening to Ma Muse 's Glorious song over and over the past two days.....this is my way.  i will listen to the same cd or song repeatedly and then move on.

i showered this morning and then immediately put on my swimsuit....just in case.   this is the way it is for this georgia girl, and the way it will continue to be until the end of september probably.  always, always be prepared for the possibility of reprieve from the heat.

i want to start a nonprofit or kickstarter fund to buy yarn and crochet scarves for the needy....i like the idea of thinking about love while making a hat or scarf....because let's face it, crocheting something can only be a labor of love....

so far today all i have had is blackberries, raspberries, an orange, a peach, an apple with peanut butter......this much fruit can't be good eh?.....i can't help myself.

...and i'm off to make more jewelry for the etsy shop, new earrings have been listed this week.  

have a great day!

Friday, May 4, 2012

a lot of yes


yes, my clothes once again reside in my suitcase.  i can't help myself.
yes, daily i look online at vw vans and the like to travel in.
yes, i have dreamed every. single. night. this week about riding on a bike through hills, streets, back roads, even into buildings (funny how my mode of transportation in my dreams has changed the past few months)
and why yes i have given away even MORE stuff than i did before i left on my 3 month long trip. 

soon......soon i will pack up (or in my case, NOT pack up 'cause it's already packed) and head out again.  until then i wake up every morning, drink coffee, make jewelry, email customers back, and i daydream about my next journey.   i am considering starting a Kickstarter project in order to fund my travels and aspiration to document and give back along the way....i mean why not right?....people are buying jewelry in the etsy shop...why not offer it in a donation package.    let's add that to my to-do list this week :)

have a great weekend everyone!  love to you all!


Thursday, April 26, 2012

moving right along...

chopping tomatoes at Pixie's house, california, january 2012

so this was my facebook status update yesterday,

i vow to consume at least one tomato sandwich a day until the end of summer,
to keep my feet in their birthday suit for the next 6 months (aka no socks), to read a book once a week while sitting outside soaking up nature...maybe even while wearing MY bday suit...harharhar. it's all about dreaming big people. :)
 I am happy to say that i am doing a GREAT job with this so far.  Success is within my reach.

Wednesday, April 25, 2012

road trip!

Point Reyes, California, Jan 2012
Georgia sunshine and warm weather is BACK!  this can only mean a road trip is in order!  there is nothing quite like open windows, open roads, great music, and dancing in the car seat.   what are your favorite road trip songs?

Tuesday, April 24, 2012

define joy...

central california coast, march 2012




songs/lyrics i've had in my head for days:

~safety dance lyrics....and if they don't dance, well they're no friends on mine....
~we built this city on rock annndd roooollll...oooooohhhhhh

DEFINE JOY:

  • sand, ocean, waves, water....any shoreline i can walk on
  • sunshine.  sunshine. sunshine.
  • smooth pebbles i can hold in my hands
  • summer time!!
  • a juicy ripe peach
  • green lush open fields that i can run through or at least imagine i am running through
  • road trips with the windows rolled down
  • laughing until my stomach hurts
  • barefeet
  • the exhilaration and the moments before you leap into cold water
  • building and tending a fire outside at night
  • impromptu dancing with friends...or by myself for that matter
  • the unexpected funny texts i get from dear friends
  • road trip playlists/music
  • feeling the sun on my face
  • waking up with the sun
  • seeing bees, butterflies, and hummingbirds all gathered around flowers i plant
JOY is in the little things....that really aren't little at all. :)

how do YOU define joy?




Saturday, April 21, 2012

Thursday, April 19, 2012

questions....so many questions.


words can save us.  they have.  they do.  they will.  right?

do you filter yourself in words?  in your speech?  in your conversations?  in your blog?  in your email?  why do you?

do you ever have urges to do things like climb a tree?  run gleefully through a field?  jump and splash in a puddle?  leap into a lake, river, pond, pool?   do you give in to the urges?  if the answer is no, why not? 

are you who you wish yourself to be?  if you aren't, what changes would you like to make? 

do you bite your tongue when you should speak up?  do you speak up when you should bite your tongue?  what lessons keep repeating themselves?

questions, questions, questions.  wouldn't it be nice to silence our minds for at least one day of the week?....there goes another question.




Monday, April 16, 2012

I got the sun in the morning....

Pismo Beach, California, March 2012

Taking stock of what I have and what I haven't,
What do I find?
The things I've got will keep me satisfied.
Checking up on what I have and what I haven't.
What do I find?
A healthy balance on the credit side.

Got no diamond, got no pearl, still I think I'm a lucky girl.
I got the sun in the morning and the moon at night.
Got no mansion, got no yacht, still I'm happy with what I've got.
I got the sun in the morning and the moon at night.

Sunshine gives me a lovely day.
Moonlight gives me the Milky Way.

Got no checkbooks, got no banks, still I'd like to express my thanks.
I got the sun in the morning and the moon at night.
And with the sun in the morning and the moon in the evening, I'm all right.
~Irving  Berlin

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I am marinating salmon fillets in some yummy Mojo citrus sauce.  I have bacon in the oven for broccoli salad.  I am drinking Yerba Mate tea.  I am listening to Langhorne Slim.  All is well in my world tonight.

Sunday, April 15, 2012

words in my head....

three graces farm, sonoma county, california

travel.
movement.
journey.
health.
coffee.
organic.
raw.
lettuce.
books.
reflection.
community.
love.
support.
world.
purpose.
enlightenment.
peace.
joy.
aliveness.
happy.
playful.
laughter.
swings.
runs.
fields.
flowers.
photos.
smile.
exuberance.
.......................................................what's in your head?

Friday, April 13, 2012

the peace of wild things...


When despair for the world grows in me
and I wake in the night at the least sound
in fear of what my life and my children's lives may be,
I go and lie down where the wood drake
rests in his beauty on the water, and the great heron feeds,
I come into the peace of wild things
who do not tax their lives with forethought
of grief.  I come into the presence of still water.
And I feel above me the day-blind stars
waiting with their light.  For a time
I rest in the grace of the world, and am free.

"The Peace of Wild Things" ~wendell berry

Thursday, April 12, 2012

feeding my soul....


Yesterday fed my soul ~ post office to send off etsy orders, farmers market to get some fresh and local produce, library trip to feed my mind's hunger, grocery store to feed my stomach's hunger, plant/flower buying and scored on some clearance snapdragons and dianthus - my mailbox area is VERY happy. 

Today I woke up, poured coffee, filled a bucket full of handmade organic mixed soil, grabbed snapdragons and headed outside in my pjs to feel the dirt between my fingers.  Bees flocked to the flowers immediately, and I had to patiently wait as they do what bees do.....

I am back inside, still in pjs, still drinking coffee, dirt still under my nails.....a book is opened beside me, jewelry supplies are spread out and ready to be manipulated and fondled.  :)    Is today a good day?...yes, i believe so. 

What does your day look like?  What can you do today to feed your mind and soul?....and maybe even your stomach.

Tuesday, April 10, 2012

what's a closet?



DAY 8 (??) of being back ~  I feel like packing a suitcase.  Not that I am going anywhere, but just to see it packed...just in case.  I had a good day of creating jewelry yesterday, staying outside, taking photos of jewelry........but it was all with travel in mind.  It wasn't about making jewelry, it was about knowing that when jewelry sells I am one more step closer to taking another trip.  I have ants in my pants and I don't think it's going away. 

So I get up everyday, turn on computer, go pour coffee, come back and sit on my bed....I think about where I will go next.  I think that if I go ahead and decide, that maybe just maybe, it will manifest itself quicker.  Isn't that how it works?  To be so open about it all is maybe my downfall?.....lack of focus?...lack of destination?.....but for me it isn't about the destination (unless it's of course some tropical oasis of turquoise water and coconut drinks); it's about the movement to get there.  Perhaps that's why I loved the train trip cross country so much ~ absolutely nothing to do but to watch the world outside go by.  No worries of getting my luggage; I had it all near me, at my fingertips....no worry of am I going the right way, is this the right bus....will I like where i'm going next...etc etc.  Living on a train for days was calming.   Every stop wasn't my own; I was good for days....I was content with my books, iphone, food/snacks, listening to the conversations around me, people watching, scenery outside, reclining seat......it forced me to relax, to sit still, to just BE. 

to do list:
1. hone in where I want to go.
2. make it happen

Friday, April 6, 2012

a bit of Rumi....


Unfold Your Own Myth ~ Rumi

Who gets up early to discover the moment light begins?
Who finds us here circling, bewildered, like atoms?
Who comes to a spring thirsty
and sees the moon reflected in it?
Who, like Jacob blind with grief and age,
smells the shirt of his lost son
and can see again?
Who lets a bucket down and brings up
a flowing prophet?  Or like Moses goes for fire
and finds what burns inside the sunrise?

Jesus slips into a house to escape enemies,
and opens a door to the other world.
Solomon cuts open a fish, and there's a gold ring.
Omar storms in to kill a prophet
and leaves with blessings.
Chase a deer and end up everywhere!
An oyster opens his mouth to swallow one drop.
Now there's a pearl.
A vagrant wanders empty ruins.
Suddenly he's wealthy.

But don't be satisfied with stories, how things
have gone with others.  Unfold
your own myth, without complicated explanation,
so everyone will understand the passage,
We have opened you.

Start walking towards Shams.  Your legs will get heavy
and tired.  Then comes a moment
of feeling the wings you've grown,
lifting.

wild mind...

                                     (books at Teahouse Studio)
Grant me some wild expressions, Heavens, or I shall burst.

Thursday, April 5, 2012

totally random....


So, in my quest to find travel documentaries I have found one I am quite smitten with ~ Jane's Journey.  Jane Goodall has always been someone I looked up to, even more so as a young girl.  As soon as I found out about this amazing, animal loving, courageous, entrancing soul I was enthralled ~ and have been ever since.  This is a must watch for anyone who likes her.  Don't be fooled by the "starring angelina jolie and pierce brosnan" bit...they don't star in the documentary; they only give jane goodall praises here and there.

Onto other news, I had this intoxicating (not really) smoky Russian tea while in California, and I haven't been able to capture that taste since.  Does anyone have any recommendation for a good smoky flavored hot tea?  (cause I am breaking my bank account buying teas that don't match up)

Oh yes, DAY 4 (of being back) ~ still moody, but I have finally opened up my jewelry supply boxes so that must be a sign of spirits improving eh?  I took a trip to the farmer's market yesterday (which always sends me into fits of ooooohhhhs and aaahhhhhhs).....and ooooooh the strawberries.  One customer eying me says "if you keep on sniffing those strawberries they are gonna start charging you per sniff".......yes, it was that bad...errr, good?......

Isn't there always a particular food/fruit/veggie/whatev that can send you straight back to your childhood?  Strawberries do it for me ~ the memories of strawberry patches right outside the kitchen window, or in our front yard (more expansive)....picking them straight off the vine, eating them all before I could get them in the kitchen as requested by my mother (though I never heard her fuss for the lack of berries when I brought them in).  strawberry shortcake ~ strawberries with a bit of sugar ~ strawberries straight off the vine ~ any way strawberries could get in my mouth I was game :)
What food takes you back to your childhood?

side note: I have been gifted a little video camera from Jen that I have been playing with this week.  (i'm pretty sure I was gifted this cause of my mad skills at the jaw harp....i just know it), so amateur videos are headed this way soon!  No, no, don't cheer just yet......wait until I upload it first, then you can cheer all you want. Hehe.  

Wednesday, April 4, 2012

day 3 ~ i have run out of things to say...obviously


DAY 3 ~ SHOCKING changes in myself since i took my trip (okay, maybe not shocking, but changes nonetheless)

1. i am now a trader joe's snob (and think there should be one in every town)

2. i now make a disgusted look when i see that meat has nitrates (i mean seriously, i can't find anything in the local stores, ugh)

3. i now say "dude" way too much (though i think i was doing this before)

4. why the heck can't i have orange/lemon/avocado trees in my backyard!?....(not a change, but c'mon)

5.  i have learned i sleep better with one pillow, not FIVE like i thought i needed before i left :)

sooooo,  there you have it.    that's all i have.   too much change internally to really even describe here...some i haven't even processed yet.   today is a bit better with mood....mostly relating to waking up determined to get on the road again ASAP.   still have yet to unpack suitcase all the way.  jewelry supplies/tools?...forget it.   that will happen only with a cold drink or two and when i finally stub each and every toe i have on the boxes (still laying on the floor in the middle of the walkway).  

back to getting on the road ASAP.......manifesting a way to get paid while traveling.  making jewelry can only bring in so much, plus i actually have to MAKE jewelry on the road, and then bring all the supplies, beads, tools, finished products with me.  i've done this already, it became very complicated, very quickly; looking for a simpler approach this time around...and also simple packing.  i'm all about simplicity; less is more approach. 

though the freedom of driving is ideal.....the slow pace of a train cross country, not paying gas prices, scenic views ~hard to top that.   still smitten with going through utah/colorado by train.....one of the highlights of my life.   i will be traveling by train MUCH MUCH MORE as time goes on.  experience of a lifetime.

side note, does anybody use jojoba oil?...isn't it the most amazing ever?