dig deep.

what do i want? like really, honestly, true to the core of who i am, no inhibitions, no setbacks, no restraints??.......i want peace in the midst of whatever life brings...calamity, struggle, chaos, roller coasters, hurt, pain, loss, mistakes made...living with them...making a life beyond them and their lasting effects, etc etc. i want to live my life by giving back in the best way i can....with my gifts, my talents, what I am good at, my strengths...my laughter and ability to be silly under any circumstance, my compassion, my openness, my understanding, my empathy, my curiousity....all the things i don't always notice about myself that are good...that are me....that are what i have to offer. i want to give THAT to the world....i want it to mean something.

how do i achieve this? dedication. awareness. patience and resolve. persistence. love, above all love. and openness.....i want life to rush through me....with fervor and excited joy....i want to offer myself over to life.....i want to sit down with life and say 'i am here, i am ready to learn, let me hear everything you have to say....i will share your wisdom, your stories, your joy.

beyond all this rambling and jibber jabber.............i want to roam. i want to really hear people. i want to know what makes your soul dance...and you and you and you. i want to do this AND be creative and give my soul a chance to shine.

Who are we when we strip ourselves down to the bare essentials? are we good people? what have we lost along the way? do you remember who you were before the responsibilities of life brought hardship, heartache, pain, and confusion? Is there a way to tap into this? What DOES make you tap into that part of you? What memories make you smile? What things NOW do that?

I have SO MANY ideas bubbling over. The one that has always stuck with me though, is the desire to travel and hear these stories, document it, research these things.....everyday people....anywhere and everywhere. I am fascinated by people...their behaviors...why they do the things they do, say the things they say.......

the point is, is that i have decided to make some changes.....from here on out, everything i earn, money and otherwise, will go to this mission. I want to travel and seek out life....i want to meet you, whoever you are.....
I am giving away or selling my belongings. I am dedicating my life to seeking out joy.....the things that make our soul's dance. I welcome you to participate in this.....i'll be sending out letters, questions, etc to all of you at some time or another in the next few months......i want to hear your stories.

A part of this plan as well, is to help those whom haven't found that joy yet....whose souls' cannot find peace....who aren't able to dance. this will be part of the random acts of kindness. i have enough creativity in me to offer my services in this way as well. i can crochet hats/scarves, blankets for those in need. i can plant flowers, grow veggies, give away veggie plants to those who need them, etc....you get the drift......this will be a project of sorts that i am the most excited about. THIS is the thing i have always wanted to do.....i've always said/thought that if i ever find out i have only a year to live, this kind of thing is what i will spend my time doing.....making a difference....using my creativity and compassion to help while i still have time to give back to this life. i realize this is something that should be done anyway....but with time pressing i would want to enjoy the simple things....giving....seeking out nature.....hearing stories.....it all matters. we all matter. we all have something to give. every little thing we can give to someone could change their lives....it might be all they need to hang on and persevere.

so......i challenge myself to this.....to buying a vehicle/rv/van to guide me in this journey. i ask you to tell me what you would do....how you would give back...what you have to offer.....what place is in need of help....who you know who would benefit from this......suggest away. as soon as i get the financial resources needed, i will be on my way........i will start now of course, but would love to further this by traveling around the country with this mission.

i am open and ready to dig deep.

(if you choose to donate to this fund, please click on the 'Chip In' button and donate away....i also have an etsy shop that you can buy colorful happy items from that will aid in this journey as well...i will be documenting this by blogging, vlogging, and videos......so keep checking back!)

(UPDATE : i can't get the chip in widget to post for some reason....so i will have to use paypal donate feature for now...) try this link if you want to help. MY SOUL CAN DANCE MISSION