the quest....

the quest for simplicity is a long one....and a soul searching one......sometimes you realize you are hanging onto things you didn't even realize you were.

How To Be Alone

this is so amazing. fantastic. beautiful. brilliant. and i am in love with it. it's exactly the thing i wanted and needed to see today...just because it's how i feel.....i have always found beauty in solitude......

what i have learned and how i have changed....

~ you have to find balance in yourself....constantly maintain it.....find your center

~i once loved shopping malls, now i love thrift stores

~i compare myself less to other women now...i'm happier for it ( it still happens when i'm feeling low )

~instead of comparing yourself to other women / people, we must learn to celebrate our differences....if someone is beautiful or has better legs or boobs or eyes or jobs or whatever, embrace it and be happy for them...don't resent anyone for what they have, because guaranteed there is *SOMETHING* they don't like about themselves. we are all struggling with the same things.

~let go more.....dance....sing when you want....smile.....learn to dance even though life is stressful.

~dancing it out really does help

~pay attention

~listen

~realize that there is always more than meets the eye...when it comes to situations, people, life

~strive to find joy.......claw at it...fight for it.....live it.....be it......learn to see it and seize it when it comes your way.....create it........be a source of joy.......

~LOVE LOVE LOVE with all your heart..............ALWAYS keep your heart open ....even when things can bring you pain.....love anyway.

~learn your limits.....eliminate and cast aside people and things that push your limits in a negative way.

~always keep learning

~you can be afraid of change, but embrace change anyway

~push your comfort zones whenever you can......it leads to a happier life and soul

~find your tribe.....maintain it....appreciate it.....nurture it even when you think you don't have the time

~love your friends, your family.....love the world you live in

~don't litter.....EVER.....pick up trash if you see it

~gossip less.....you taint yourself and your life and the world around you by doing so.....i know, i know....sometimes it's easy to fall into it and participate in it...but actively try not to

~dream big. never stop dreaming. but also learn to love what you have....

~don't take yourself too seriously.....laugh at yourself as much as you can. believe me on this one...i practice it daily :)

i can't even begin to *really* describe how much i have changed over the past decade. i love getting older....i love growing more comfortable with who i am....i love that every year i ease more into myself......the older i get, the more i love life and see that there is beauty even with all the struggles of it.

the trials of growing up....

i adore simplicity....this wasn't always the case. in the past i embraced and even wanted complicated, chaotic, messy.....i didn't really realize at the time it was chaotic...i thought it was exciting, living life to the fullest, no inhibitions. I can now appreciate calmness and self-control....the ability to choose, and not give in to every whim without thinking first if it's the best decision for me....is it positive or negative?.....

We spend our whole lives growing up don't we?.....we all have various different areas we need help on...or growth...or change....we do the best we can...sometimes we don't though...and if we can recognize that we have the ability to grow and evolve into better people....it takes time, effort, persistence...hard work...stepping forward and back until we find our pace. it's ever changing.....life is hard...no doubt about that. What is important to us one day, no longer seems important months or years later.

I am beginning to see how much i've changed over the past few years.....when you withdraw for a bit, and step back into the world...everything is the same...but you aren't....what you would have settled for in the past seems absurd now....silly even. Without getting too specific i am starting to see things in a new light.....the certain sort of things that seemed shiny, sparkly, and glittery before, are now dull, lackluster, in the long run boring....

anyway.......

new adventures are on the horizon, and i'm beyond excited. what simple things are you enjoying this summer?

everything i know...

"People universally tend to think that happiness is a stroke of luck, something that will maybe descend upon you like fine weather if you're fortunate enough. But that's not how happiness works. Happiness is the consequence of personal effort. You fight for it, strive for it, insist upon it, and sometimes even travel around the world looking for it. You have to participate relentlessly in the manifestations of your own blessings. And once you have achieved a state of happiness, you must never become lax about maintaining it, you must make a mighty effort to keep swimming upward into happiness forever, to stay afloat on top of it. If you don't, you will leak away your innate contentment. It's easy enough to pray when you're in distress but continuing to pray even when your crisis has passed is like a sealing process, helping your soul hold tight to its good attainments." ~Eat, Pray, Love

blissfully free....

what did i accomplish today? forget all the little things......i ran 5 miles today. RAN them. yes, ran them. i am deliriously, blissfully, gratefully tired....grateful that i still have it in me to run...that i have legs to run with....that my health is well enough that i can even withstand running that far since i haven't in so long. blissfully.......i LOVE running....i love the feeling...the freedom....the burn in my legs....the sweat....the persistence....the knowing that i am doing something good for my body......all of it.

the photo above, is pre-running leg........let's see how i do after a week.

what i know is that....

i need the outdoors to feel alive, calm, excited, sane, wild, happy, driven, focused, relaxed, vital.

I NEED NATURE LIKE I NEED AIR TO BREATHE.