Wednesday, December 28, 2011

what matters....


What do I seek? 
What does anyone seek?

We are individuals that make up a collective whole....so in general, we must strive for the same things.  Peace of mind?  Stress free lives?  Love. I don't need a question mark for that one...that one I know.  More laughter? Creative freedom? *What* do we strive for every day?  Do we lose sight of it from time to time?  Do we get lost in the whirlwind of a day to day job?...of making breakfast, getting kids to school, helping with homework, fixing the car, calling the plumber, mending buttons that are loose, brushing our teeth, changing the sheets, and doing the laundry.  You see, it's easy to get lost in all that mix;  BUT isn't life IN THAT MIX....isn't that where we find those moments? Isn't it about nurturing ourselves and those we love? 

Take for example someone who doesn't have anyone...or someone who has lost a spouse, a child, a best friend, a mom or dad....wouldn't they give anything just to have those moments where making breakfast, brushing teeth, and changing the laundry were something of a nuisance instead of those moments that made life painful....those seemingly meaningless tasks that just magnify their heartache, grief, or loneliness.  We all know what that is like...we all know.   Not one of us has escaped heartache. 

My heart is heavy these days...it isn't debilitating..even though sometimes we think it should be.  Life goes on.  We lose ones we love.  Those we love hurt us by hurting themselves.  Dear friends are in depths of pain that I can't imagine, and don't want to.  We see family or friends who are stuck. stagnant. stifled by their own shadows.   ...and then we see our own selves....whatever our issues may be.  So, what do we do?  Most of us carry on...keep doing what we have to do.  In the best case scenario, we can still find joy in those little moments...getting the kids to school (having your child turn around and smile), helping with homework (being reminded your kids still need you), changing the sheets (the whiff of that fresh clean laundry scent).  IT ALL MATTERS.  What we do *every* *single* *day* matters.  WE MATTER...and isn't that *IT* right there? We all want to MATTER...and we do. We want our lives to matter...and they do...no matter if we are in the pits of despair, or in the throws of joy and love. 

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