wild daydreams

change can be scary...especially when you know change is needed but aren't yet sure what it will mean and where you are headed....you just KNOW it has to happen.  you know when you are done with something...or when it's time to move on...or when you need to stop eating meat (for example, like I did last year).  i tend to linger on with something until it is absolutely necessary for me to leave or walk away from it...it has not only run it's course, but run ME ragged trying to force what doesn't feel right anymore. 

i've been entertaining myself with wild daydreams....letting my mind wander where it wants to go without restrictions from my so called "realistic" self.  i have found i have BIG ones....i see myself doing all sorts of things ...things i will probably always ache to do if i don't in some form or another pursue them.  i can daydream all i want about "being a rockstar" (not really but playing music for others, yes) , but that has no chance of even remotely coming true until i learn how to play at least ONE instrument fully. ...the same goes for the daydreams about fly fishing in rivers, traveling the world taking photographs, etc etc.   YES, these are all daydreams i have and true desires that are instilled in me from who knows where but they are there...and i discredit a part of me by ignoring them. 

so there you have it. 

the birds and the bees...

i'm feeling the need to unplug...indefinitely.  this urge has nothing to do with the reality of the situation.  i won't unplug...if this were the birds and the bees my progress of unplugging would be 2nd base...perhaps even only 1st base.  I've been thinking about how i interacted with the world around me as a child....i was outside lost in either nature or books...or both, which was my favorite.  the bus would pull up to driveway, i would hop out, run to the porch, dash into my room, toss the bookbag on the floor, grab a book and my compass, bound to the kitchen and fill a thermos full of Kool-Aid, then out the door i'd go for hours.  i daydreamed of being a hobo...as soon as my mother showed me how to tie a bandanna to a long stick and carry my stuff in it this because my obsession.  i envisioned myself jumping trains and traveling here and there....it's funny how that's sorta what i did in 2012.   my point being that i had no use for technology (other than my trusty compass which i had no real need for, it just fueled my imagination), i only wanted blue skies and sunshine, the grass under my feet, swaying trees to climb...sure, things are simpler as a kid than as an adult, but do they have to be?  why can't we all still get lost in nature like we did as children?  why can't we go leaping and dashing into open fields?.....i know i still do, but my phone is always with me....i'm always connected or can be...a distraction is a mere second away. 

i tell myself every day that life is short...there is no time for regrets or setting things to the side to do later.....i started out 2013 with big plans...yet again, i use the birds and the bees reference....i'm only on 1st base with 2013......it's time for some hot and heavy action.

a good life

“I want a life that sizzles and pops and makes me laugh out loud. And I don't want to get to the end, or to tomorrow, even, and realize that my life is a collection of meetings and pop cans and errands and receipts and dirty dishes. I want to eat cold tangerines and sing out loud in the car with the windows open and wear pink shoes and stay up all night laughing and paint my walls the exact color of the sky right now. I want to sleep hard on clean white sheets and throw parties and eat ripe tomatoes and read books so good they make me jump up and down, and I want my everyday to make God belly laugh, glad that he gave life to someone who loves the gift.”
― Shauna Niequist, Cold Tangerines: Celebrating the Extraordinary Nature of Everyday Life    

Growth

Lettuce seeds bursting into life

Dance

Don't forget to dance!!

2013 the year of learning

it's 2013 and a year for learning.  i have one thing each month i am learning how to do or more about.  in the past i've had things on my list and never followed through with learning them.  i was neglecting to pay attention to how i learn.  when i am into something new i become obsessed with it....i pick it up constantly throughout the day...i think about it all the time....if i don't keep going with it at a fast pace i will lose the interest, or rather i will lose speed....i need to go at it full-force.   so on that note i will give myself a month with these things to learn.  i have also spaced out the months to include a couple of things bi-weekly to break it up.  this will make more sense as time goes on because i will be photographing and documenting it.  yay! 

what projects are on your 2013 to-do list? 

New Year

2013 is all about having fun and getting things done!